Masturbation: what a loaded concept, particularly for vulva-owning individuals. Personally I find it odd that women are socialized to be “people-pleasers”; but when it comes to pleasuring ourselves, it may not be as popular! How intriguing...
So before diving in, let’s start with debunking some popular masturbation myths...
Myth #1- Women Stop Masturbating Once They’re In A Relationship – Completely Untrue
According to the Journal of Sexual Medicine1, “For many women, masturbation does not represent "a partner substitute" to seek sexual pleasure, but rather is a stress coping and relaxation strategy.” In fact, having a sexual partner creates an ideal environment for mutual masturbation. Showing your partner exactly where and how you like it can be both an educational and erotic experience. What's more? Masturbation can actually improve your sex life...
Myth #2- It’s Unhealthy To Masturbate “too much”
- Not ReallyWhat is “too much” for one person is “not enough” for another. Superlatives rarely capture the nuances of any situation- sexual proclivities, included. There are actually numerous health benefits to masturbation (more on this later!) that may actually improve your overall well-being.
Myth #3- Masturbation Puts You At Risk For Infertility - False
Masturbation itself does not negatively affect fertility, so feel free to wank off to your hearts’ content. However, there are certain habits that may assist or inhibit your ability to get pregnant. For example:keeping your toys clean of bacteria to avoid contracting an STI that affects fertility is hugely important. No matter how dirty you get while doing the deed, you can still keep it clean.
Myth #4- All Masturbation Needs To Lead To Orgasm - Not Necessarily
First things first : NOT all masturbation needs to lead to orgasm.
Masturbation should be regarded as a glorified spectrum of experiences and sensations to get to know your body, not a one-way-road-to-the-big’O’.
Introducing the clitoris: If you haven’t seen a picture of a clitoris before, no worries, my friend: it’s not altogether surprising. While medical professionals have known about the clitoris as a sexual organ for decades, it wasn’t fully mapped out anatomically until 1981 (for those of us mathematically impaired, that’s only 40 years- less than a lifetime ago!). While you may only be familiar with the head of the clitoris, the organ actually extends towards the inner wall of your vulva as well. So that “ever-elusive G-Spot '' isn't precisely a spot, per se: it’s the inner wall of the clitoris being stimulated in a way that’s just right.
Myth #5- The Biggest & Most Powerful Sex Organ? - Not What You Think!
There are other erogenous zones that can be passionately targeted during masturbation and foreplay- nipples, the buttox, and neck, to name a few. But: what if I were to tell you that that biggest and most powerful sex organ was actually... YOUR BRAIN.
Bizarre as it sounds, your brain is actually your biggest Sex Super-hero, not necessarily whatever hardware is down there. Do you find yourself daydreaming about your latest steamy encounter or fantasizing about a threesome with other people? These are untapped sexual potential of your brain. And- in this author’s humble opinion- one of the most underrated components of improving your sex life. Personally, sexual fantasies are my favorite mental playground. It’s important to become aware of how you think and fantasize about sex.
During sex and masturbation, your brain starts to release all sorts of “feel-good” chemical cocktails: dopamine, oxytocin, and serotonin. They can make you feel energetic and excited when it’s released.
In short: masturbation can feel great physically, make us feel more connected, and help our minds relax. Win-win-WIN.
Tips & Toys For Vulva Owners’ Masturbation
If you’re not already locking your doors and putting up a “Do Not Disturb Sign” get ready to roll into Masturbation Station with some best tips and sex toys to help you in the bedroom, or living room, or wherever floats your boats...
Set the stage
Masturbation activates many of our senses inside and out, so creating an environment where you are relaxed and undisturbed can go a long way to having a positive experience. Light a scented candle, put on some sensual music, set some mood lighting. In short: Woo yourself- you deserve it.
Start slow & use lube
Masturbation is a highly personal experience, so it may take a while (or several sessions) to warm up and understand how your body reacts to certain stimuli. Location, temperature, pressure, and speed are all components to experiment with. I would also recommend getting a water-based lube to keep things smooth and comfortable.
As you’re exploring, keep in mind you might not react to stimuli the same way in back-to-back sessions. That’s why self-pleasuring is so great- you can have an immediate feedback loop of what feels good on any given day.
Add Toys To You Solo Sessions
Bringing sex toys into the bedroom opens vulva owners up to a range of sensations that you just can't experience with your hands or with a partner. The right sex toys let you explore your G-spot and other erogenous zones at your own pace without feeling rushed or pressured.
To make it easier to find a toy that fits your lifestyle and pleasure needs, we did the work for you by teaming up with luxury sex toy designer brand Hot Octopuss]from London, UK. These are their recommendations for the best sex toys for vulva owners' masturbation; consider having one (or more!) on hand.
The Best G-spot Vibrator - KURVE
If you are a big fan of internal stimulation as I am, a G-spot vibrator like the KURVE can take you to new climaxes.
KURVE features our patented dual-motor Treble and Bass technology™, offering the ultimate in user customisation. The soft gel tip provides a broad surface area and ergonomic contours that ensure the right kind of pressure just where you want it. KURVE is a sex toy superhero on a mission to seek out your G-spot - So the mystery of YOUR G-spot is solved!
The Best Fingertip Vibe - DiGiT
Undeniably delightful and ergonomic, DiGiT is undoubtedly the perfect fingertip vibrator for clitoral stimulation. It can be used as an amplified extension of your body and can pin-point specific areas for targeted pleasure. This versatile finger vibrator will enhance the way vulva owners masturbate and take sex and solo play sessions to new levels. With its large rumbly motor and five power settings, DiGiT will turn your fingers into superheroes!
The Best Bullet - AMO
It’s hard to believe that such a petite bullet vibrator can pack such a powerful punch. Enclosed in AMO’s premium-grade silicone casing lies a large and powerful motor that produces seriously deep and rumbly vibrations.
AMO is ideal for adding clitoral stimulation and perfectly shaped to slide in between you and your erogenous spots. Combined with strategically placed curves, AMO enables you to switch between pinpoint and all-encompassing vibrations, you’ll be coming under fire in no time!
AMO bullet vibrator is USB-rechargeable, travel-friendly and whisper quiet so you can enjoy your private time without any interruptions even when he/she is lying right next to ya (trust me, tried and true).
Final Thoughts:
There are so many benefits to masturbation and the best part is: the way you do it IS the right way. Anything that is safe and feels good is fair game. You know what they say, after all: different strokes for different folks!
So vulva owners, to celebrate this Black Friday, why not grab a toy deal or two, set aside some “Me Time”, and enjoy yourself?
[Discover More](/campaigns/blackfriday/)
