Shakira ‘Scotty Unfamous’ Scott is an inappropriately fancy, London-based sexual wellness content creator, multi award-winning erotic romance author, co-founder of the sexual happiness experts MSSS and #DumpHim queen!
She started her blog to help women of colour explore and remove the stigma around their sexuality, educate them in the art of sensuality and promote and inspire self-love and body confidence. You can also find her on Twitter and Instagram.
One of the many reasons that I love masturbation is that it saves you from making regretful horny decisions
When I was 25 I took a vow of celibacy; no dique was to pass through these sugar walls until I knew that the person I was entertaining was right for me. Being that I have a particularly high sex drive, I knew that this would be a challenge for a self-proclaimed ‘heaux’ such as myself.
Honestly, if it hadn’t been for the wonders of self-pleasure, I would have failed within the first month. There were many nights when I would scroll through my contacts, romanticising encounters of how particular names on the list made me feel when our bodies tangled between the sheets, and my core would throb with temptation.
That was when I knew that it was time for some solo action
Once I gorged enough adult content and caressed my centre with my hands or one of my many intimate devices, my orgasms would shatter my rose-tinted memories. And the urge to call that person would wither away into common sense. Three years later (wanking really held me down lol) when I finally came across the ‘right’ one, I was VERY well versed in what my body was capable of, confident in my sexuality, my desires and communicating them without shame. This is the level of sluttery that I hope you may all achieve. And in this blog I’m going to give you a few tips so that you may do just that.
The merry month of May symbolises sexual awakening. So it’s only right that it is the official month of Masturbation, with the 28th of May marking International Masturbation Day. Yes, it’s really a thing.
Masturbation May came about as a form of protest in 1995
The movement was instigated by San Francisco sex shop, Good Vibrations after Surgeon General Joycelyn Elders was fired by Bill Clinton in late 1994. At a United Nations conference about the AIDS epidemic, Dr Elders responded to a question about her thoughts on masturbation advocacy as a tool to help reduce the spread of HIV and other STIs. She suggested that masturbation should be taught as it is a part of human sexuality – a reasonable suggestion…that got her the boot.
Masturbation month raises awareness about a perfectly natural act that is often shrouded in shame. (Even though most people do it!)
May highlights the importance of self-pleasure. As there are only a few days left to go for this magical month (not that the fun should stop when the month is over) I encourage you to indulge yourself, whether it’s for your overall wellness or to keep away from that person you know you shouldn’t call.
Benefits of solo sex include helping you get a good night’s sleep, boosting your libido, and relieving pain and stress. It also increases your sexual confidence and most importantly, helps you get to know your body. I stress the latter the most because if you want to have an exceptional time in le boudoir, knowing exactly what your body likes is the best way forward. Not only for you, but also for your luvahs! That’s because it empowers you to communicate the best way to get you off.
When we engage in self-pleasure, we tend to go straight for our genitals.
We often end up neglecting the rest of our body, which is covered in a variety of erogenous zones
I encourage you to take your time with yourself and explore every inch of skin available because you never know what delights you might discover. You can do this by simply stroking, but to add some razzle-dazzle try using massage oils. You may find that areas such as the back of your knees and your inner thigh can be quite titillating.
Another way to bring yourself to climax is by making use of your surroundings
Try humping a pillow! Clamber aboard the arm of a chair. Lay on your front and grind against your bed. Experiment with textures, e.g., try touching yourself over your underwear or using your foreskin/clitoral hood as a pleasurable barrier for slightly less intense sensations.
When using your hands, switch up your touch technique
Try tapping, stroking and circular motions or alternating your pressure/speed. When touching your genitals, explore the entire area. This is a great way to experiment with edging, by bringing yourself close to climax but stopping before it happens. Then you can build the sensation up to a more powerful orgasm when you finally let go.
For penis-owners, try playing with your testicles or your perineum (taint). Or you could give yourself some anal stimulation by rubbing on the external part of your anus. You could also try penetrating it and stimulating your prostate which is about 4 inches inside of your rectum.
For vulva owners, try massaging your mons venus (the area on top of your vulva where your pubic hair grows). Speaking of your labia, play with that too – some light stroking works wonders.
Crank your solo play up a notch by stimulating two or more areas at the same time
This can give you a powerful blended orgasm! My favourite way to do this is by including sex toys in my play. They provide the kind of sensations that hands alone just aren’t capable of!
For penis-owners this could look like using a guygrator by Hot Octopuss. JETT in particular is known for providing handsfree orgasms. As your hands are free you could use them to stimulate your testicles/nipples/prostate at the same time. For vulva-owners try using PULSE QUEEN on your clitoris whilst you use your other hand to penetrate yourself or play with your nipples. Trust me, you’ve never had a truly mind-blowing orgasm until you’ve had a blended one.
So go forth and masturbate this May, my loves
Give yourself all the orgasms you desire. You have the right to enjoy your body and experience pleasure without reservation or shame!
If you would like to hear more wonderful words of whorish wisdom from me, you can find me on Twitter and Instagram, @Scotty Unfamous.
Happy wanking x
