We’ve written guides before on masturbation tips for people with penises, specific masturbation tips for people with mobility issues, and even guides on how to break out of the ‘death grip’ masturbation routine. But today we wanted to focus on mutual masturbation, and give you a few less common mutual masturbation tips that we think you might enjoy. You can use sex toys, or just your hands, or a mixture of both – just make sure to communicate well with your partner and have fun!
Mutual masturbation tip 1: Mirror image
Remove as many clothes as you each feel comfortable with, and sit opposite your partner. Cross legged works well, but if you are more comfortable on a chair or lying on your side that works well too – not everyone has the same level of physical mobility so pick a position that’s comfortable for you both. Designate which of you is going to ‘lead’ and which will ‘follow.’
The person who leads starts touching themselves gently, wherever feels pleasurable: nipples, genitals, stomach, thighs… Try to explore more of your body than you would during a standard wank. The follower must copy their movements, as closely as possible. The ‘leader’ should try to build to almost-an-orgasm, then pause for a second as you switch roles and let the ‘follower’ take over…
Mutual masturbation tip 2: Live masturbation inspiration
One of the best things about mutual masturbation is that you have real live sexy material right in front of you – in the form of your mutual masturbation partner! While many people watch porn, read erotica, or conjure sexy fantasies to get off when they’re on their own, it’s not always as common to use a real live human person as your masturbation inspiration.
Pick which of you is going to be the wanker, and which the inspiration, and have a chat about the kind of things that get them off the most. It might be a bit of sexy dancing, moaning, displaying their hot body in a particular position, or simply them telling a sexy story. This isn’t just a really fun way to masturbate with company, it’s also a great excuse to communicate more about your sex fantasies and the things that turn you on.
As with the tip above, you probably want to swap roles at some point as well, so that each of you gets the chance to fulfil your desires…
Mutual masturbation tip 3: Long-distance control
If you’re into BDSM and control, there’s a fabulous mutual masturbation game that we learned from the pioneering folks on webcam sites. On webcam sites, performers will occasionally hook up their ‘tips’ to their sex toy, meaning that every time someone tips them the toy itself vibrates. You might not have such fancy tech at hand, but you can recreate the experience over Skype (or phone) by telling your partner exactly what setting to use on their sex toy.
Tell them to get comfortable and start masturbating – maybe with a PULSE or a KURVE – and let them turn the setting (and pattern) to whatever they usually use. Order them to be as vocal as possible so you get lots of feedback on what’s working. Then as the session goes on, start to offer more instructions about what they need to do:
- Now turn it down
- Take the toy away for ten seconds
- Swap the toy out for your hand, but only for five seconds
- OK, now switch it to max…
The aim is to tease them towards the brink of an orgasm, then bring them back again, for as long as they can handle it before they need to climax…
If you're looking to add excitement to long-distance play, check out our article, "Tips for Long-Distance Sex: Elevate Your Connection with Toys and Playful Intimacy" packed with helpful tips to keep the spark alive across the miles.
And there you have it – three unusual mutual masturbation tips that you can make the most of any time. Alongside these, there are the standard tricks too, of course: simply lying next to each other and using your hands (or a toy) to stimulate your partner, or yourself. But we wanted to give you a few specific tips that might give you something new to try. Because, after all, exploring new ways to enjoy your body is always worthwhile.